Lewis Howes, author and host of The School of Greatness podcast, said “The greatest crime we can commit is going to bed without a dream and getting up without a purpose.” 

WHAT PURPOSE ARE YOU LIVING FROM?

If you asked me three years ago what my purpose was, I would say to know God and make Him known, love my wife unconditionally, and instill a love for the gospel in my children. That was my intention. But my thoughts and actions showed otherwise.

The morning alarm triggered my recurring question, “What do I need to do to ensure nothing goes wrong today?” Pretty silly when I stop to think about it. It deactivated my good intentions and reduced my purpose to self-protection. 

I would scan the day ahead for potential land mines: a contractor calling with a costly issue, a high-stakes client meeting, or an emotional encounter with a loved one. My concerns filled my vision and my defensive posture closed me off from opportunity. 

I argued that once I was safe I could focus on what really mattered. But ensuring self-protection became a habit. Each thought, action, and rumination that aligned with the purpose of safety reinforced it.

DEFINE YOUR PURPOSE

We are hard-wired to live purposefully. Otherwise, as minister and author Hugh Prather put it, we “rumble around… and bounce haphazardly and hopelessly off every change time brings.” 

When defining your purpose, clarity is key. Craft your vision so clearly you could tell your friend who could then communicate it to someone else perfectly. When you set a clear intention, your attention and energy follow it.

God directs all believers to many common pursuits but has a unique call for each person as well. Own yours. Like eyeglasses, your unique vision requires a unique prescription. Other people won’t be looking at the world the same way you do. When I decided to pursue a woman to marry, I didn’t expect everyone who knew of my same-sex attractions to understand. They weren’t looking through my lenses. 

MAKE YOUR PURPOSE A MUST

You are the WAY you are because of the WHY you are. Minister and writer Alexander Maclaren stated: “Here is the manliness of manhood: That a man has a good reason for what he does and has a will in doing it.”

Knowing God more and making Him known, loving my wife well, and instilling the gospel in my children is what I wanted to do. I actively pursued safety because it felt like the thing I must do.

Safety was a prerequisite that never got met. It became my “must,” not love. 

How did I change? I made loving a must and safety an unnecessary luxury. I chose to associate an excessive need for it with pain. My energy spent on self-protection instead of acts of love fueled by faith was painful to myself, my family, and the work God wanted to do through me. 

SET YOUR GOALS AND BE THE PERSON THAT MEETS THEM

Where do you want to go? What is the specific address? Not just the region, city, or neighborhood. What do you need to put into your GPS to so you don’t go knocking on the wrong door?

Ask yourself these questions:

1. Who do I want to be?
2. How do I want to relate to others?
3. What do I want to create?

Lastly, describe the type of person that achieves those goals and decide you are that person now. Whether you achieve the goal or not, who you will become along the way is often more valuable. 

TAKE ACTION

“The real win is in the space between thinking about taking action and taking action. The magic of life lies in the LEAP. That is the catalyst for change, growth, and the platform for finding your purpose.” – Lewis Howes

What is the one step you can take today that will activate more decisions in line with your purpose? Act on that now to own who you are and enjoy the journey to the person you will become.